Dec 29 2008
The Top Five Jackasses of 2008: #3
Mike Nifong
- Mike Nifong at his new job
And then there was Mike Nifong. This joker’s jackassery was so awful and destructive, that even though most of the important stuff took place two years ago, in 2006, he STILL placed third in this contest, and was the early odds-on favorite to win. Had this contest been held in either 2006 or 2007, we’d be calling the Jackass trophy the Mike Nifong Memorial Cup.
I’m comtemptuous of straight ticket voters, and just plain don’t like Easley because I think he’s an incompetent clown. But Mike Nifong is a whole new critter. This guy set about using the criminal justice system to ruin innocent people’s lives in order to win an election. In so doing he personified what civil libertarians like myself fear most- government run amok. Usually, a tale of some rouge government bureaucrat with nearly unlimited power to destroy your life is a recycled plot out of a lousy movie. But Nifong made it real. What’s truly scary though, is the near certainly that there are more Nifong’s out there. Nifong’s who don’t pick on rich kids with $3 million to spend for defense lawyers and who don’t get caught abusing their power in a headline-making case.
In 2007, after the case has been pried from his grasp and the three Duke lacrosse players were exonerated, Nifong was subjected to disbarment hearings. With the parents of the three college students whose lives he tried to ruin in the room, Nifong still said that he believed “something” took place, and gave a trite and empty apology for his actions. Not surprisingly, the State Bar Disciplinary Committee was not impressed, and he became the first sitting district attorney in the history of North Carolina to be disbarred. Nifong called the process, “fundamentally unfair”. Well, he would know.
He also served a one day stint in jail. If there was any justice the world, he would have spent a year in general population with a bunch of dudes he put in jail. Dudes who thought he had a “pretty mouth”.
Just about the only time this jackass was in the news in 2008 was when he tried desperately to avoid having to pay restitution to the lacrosse players he railroaded. In January of this year he declared bankruptcy with liabilities of over $180 million. Luckily, he appears to be as incompetent as he is corrupt- the bankruptcy claim was thrown out and the civil suit against him will continue. This jackass should live in a Maytag box in some ally in Durham, and spend the rest of his life paying for what he did.
A special mini-jackass trophy goes to Crystal Gail Magnum, the waste of space stripper who instigated this whole mess by falsely accusing the Duke lacrosse team of rape. First, she said 20 people raped her. Eventually, she modified it down to three. Then, she decided that maybe she wasn’t raped at all. Then we found out that she had sex that night with two other people who weren’t even on the team.
Well, after helping almost ruin the lives of three people, she decided to write a book about it this year! She, and everyone who buys that book, are jackasses.
Finally, another special trophy goes to the members of the Duke faculty who automatically presumed the players guilty, and to the jackasses who distributed Wanted posters around campus with the faces and names of the lacrosse team members- even those who hadn’t been accused of anything. These people have yet to apologize for their actions. Geez, even Nifong sort of apologized. Jackasses all.
Tomorrow, your choice for the second biggest Jackass of 2008
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Don’t forget Nancy Grace, who joined in the rush to judgment. Then, when the DNA cleared the players, claimed that lots of defendants get convicted without DNA evidence.
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Excellent post. And one of countless “the really sad thing” things is that a lot of people still believe that this Tawana Brawley clone was raped. In the words of Schiller, “With stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain.”
Of all the people in this contest, however much damage they’ve done relative to each other, I have to admit that Nifong comes out on top in this one respect: he’s the one who, we should all agree, truly deserves to be described as evil.
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T.J.- Good call. My knowledge of Nancy Grace is limited to the (at most) cumulative 10 seconds I’ve seen of her show while flipping through channels. But I recall hearing that she took a “guilty until proven innocent… and not even then” approach to this case.
Alan- Good to see you’ve found your way over here. Yes, Mike Nifong can be accurately described as evil. Though I think I can make strong case that our #1 Jackass can too. Hope to see your comments more often.
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Thank you for the kind words.
I can’t agree with the choice of number one, but I have to admit that it’s a respectable choice, and very well-argued-for. A very good post.
I appreciate how you make the case for each winner, by the way.
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